In my quiet time with God, I finish reading passages I select in the Old and New Testament. As I begin my prayer of conversation with Him, the inner struggle begins.
I start with thanksgiving to the one who redeemed me back into a right relationship with God my Father. I tell Him how much I love Him.
The intruder, the deceiver comes and whispers in my thoughts. Yes, you love God
but how can He possibly love you. Just look at what you have done, what you have
said in the past week. Think about the thoughts you had.
I call to God –Help Father. I believe you love me. I know you love me you word tells me so. I begin to thank God for His provision in my life.
Again, the accuser of my soul whispers – Oh really. He is ready with a laundry
list of things. Did God provide this, did God provide that. God is too busy to
care about you.
You are wrong I silently answer back. Thank you Lord for your presence with me each day.
You are kidding yourself, the evil one says. Do you really think that God
has time for you. He is busy with the world and with important people. You
are just a nothing.
I lose concentration in praying and think maybe; just maybe God is too busy. Self-doubt tries to intrude in my thoughts and make me believe I am not important to God. Then God’s word floods my mind, “I will never leave you, I will never forsake you.” God loves me so much He sent His Son, His only Son to die in my place. He bought me back and paid the price for my soul.
In silent contemplation within my mind, I begin to worship my Savior. You are Wonderful, Counselor, Prince of Peace, and Everlasting Father I whisper in prayer. You are my Healer and Provider and I worship you.
Once more Satan comes and says give up. Surrender to me. I can grant you
all your desires. I will give you wealth and fame. Just forsake following after
God. He really doesn’t care.
Loudly I scream within my soul. Go away Satan; you are a liar and a deceiver. I begin to praise God as the tears roll down my face. I feel God’s presence cloak me in His love. I hear His love song released within my spirit. I sing back to Him. I’m redeemed by your love divine. Other songs learned throughout my life surface on the screen of my remembrance. “It will be worth it all when we (I) see Jesus—life’s trials will seem so small when we see Him.”
The more I affirm my love for God, the more I speak His name in praise the more I sense His presence. As I lift my heart in praise, the chains of doubt begin to break. My soul sings and my spirit rises in victory from despair.
I am a child of the king, I am forgiven, I am loved and I am His and He is mine.
I am ready to face my day confident of who I am in Christ Jesus.